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Love of two Kinds - A Poem

A bit of Poetry for all of us.

Love of Two Kinds

Some touch-

soft sweet, caress of a hand-

    on the shoulder and fingers

intertwined together in the afternoon sun.

Laughter, innocence,

     bitter experience. Expectations met disappointingly

A Friendship, A love.

whispers under blankets

              and secrets in the dark

toes trailing off the dock— into the pond

Intimacy from friendship and even beyond

Relationships are Hard

Back again from a school induced hiatus with some musings for you all.

     I’ve found over the years that being asexual gives one an unique perspective on the relationships of others. This outsider perspective is often noticeable to others, even if you haven’t told them of your sexual identity. People come to me for relationship advice quite often, assuming that I, by virtue of my “lack of distraction by sex” causes me to have a better idea of how to solve non-sexual problems in a relationship.

   Here’s a secret. I don’t have any better relationship skills than anyone else.

Nor does being asexual keep sexual problems out of my relationships. Nor are those problems all that different from those of anyone not on the Ace-spectrum.

    Sex is actually an even bigger part of asexual relationship problems for an asexual than it is for a non-ace. In addition to the typical “he/she wants more than I do” and  “He/she is into that kind of thing and I’m not” types of problems and asexual also has to ensure that their partner isn’t hurt by them having sex as well as by them not wanting to have sex.

You can hurt your partner by not being willing to do it. You can also hurt them by doing it and not being all that into it. It can hurt their feelings and cause them to experience a sense of inadequacy.

Either way someone risks getting hurt.

Relationships are hard.


The post I made earlier asking people if they felt broken before they knew about asexuality has really made me think. I put that up less than four hours ago and already 119 people have agreed with that statement. That’s an average of one person every two minutes.

Things like this remind me that…


"Everyone has sex," said the incubus.
“I’m a sex demon. I know.”

"You must have the wrong address,"
Scott said with a shrug.

"I don’t have the wrong address,"
the incubus snapped.
“I am attracted to surges of passion.
You must have been doing something
that drew me into your bedroom.”

"I was doing concept sketches,"
Scott said. “Here, look.”

Original work Infernal Passion by Ysabetwordsmith



jimjamjems asked:

Does allosexual mean any orientation that isn't asexual?


allosexual actually means when a person’s sexual orientation and romantic orientation don’t line up, say, if a person is asexual and panromantic, or biromantic but heterosexual

the best way to say “any orientation that isn’t asexual” is NOT ‘sexual’, but “non-asexual”

sometimes allosexual is used to mean ‘any orientation that isn’t asexual’ anyway

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